nothing impossible..

today..i had learned a lot....
really can see dat life as a doctor..
 will always deal with people's life..
mau atau x..takot atau x..semua tu kte kne hadapi.
cuak,cemas,blurr n sgt xtaw nk buat ape ble berhadapan dgn situasi yg memerlukan kte berusaha utk meyelamtkn 1 nyawa..
apatah lg nyawa seorg insan yg baru saje lahir ke dunia nie..
ye..kte bukan ALLAH..yg boleh menghidup dan mematikan org..
tp..kte wajib..WAJIB..!!!
berusaha sedaya upaya utk menyelamatkan nyawa tue..
berjaya atau x..belakang cerita.
yg penting kte dh berusaha...
...............................................................................................................
harinie pegi hospital mcm biase..<even on sunday ye>
after we had mock exam.
tibe2 rse nk masuk ke labour room..
msuk je tgk ade sorg mama yg dh nk deliver dh..
tibe2 staff nurse offer nk conduct delivery nie x..
then i ask..ank ke berapa punye..
then she answer it is primigavida<ank 1st>
hmm..takotnye nk conduct mama primi..
lgpon medical student mmg xdibenarkn conduct primi baby..
sbb takot nnt ade complication or mama's perinuem tear sgt truk..
tp klu xcube skang bile lg..
lgpon insyaALLAH klu buat berhati2..xde complication kot..
pastu trus kate nk kt stff nurse tue n trus pkai glove..
xsmpt pon nk pkai mask n apron..
naseb ade nani..die la yg tlong assist pkai kn..
mase tue pon mama tu dh nk beranak sgt dh..
then..nurse igtkn byk kali support btol2 mama punye perineum..nnt tear..
aku pn put effort gler2 la xnk kasi tear..
emm..benda yg paling menakotkn ble conduct delivery nie selain dr peniuem tear ialah
baby out not cying..sgt menakotkan weiii..
n it really happen to me!!...
my baby out without crying..n a bit bluish..
all my body shivering at dat tyme..muke cuak..blurr..
takot nye tuhan saje yg taw..
then nurse trus angkat baby tue n bwk pegi another room..
then me stay kt situ utk proceed 3rd stage of labour which is i need to pull out the placenta from mother's womb..
mse tue dlm hati doa byk2 hope baby tue xpape..
then nurse dtg...die kate baby tue xpape dh..
die dh nangis!!..n dh letak oxygen box kt die..
ya ALLAH...rse nk kneel down mse tue..syukur sgt baby tue xpape..
n nurse check mama's perinuem xde tear lnsg..
ya ALLAH..syukur lagi..mama xpape n baby pon ok..
thumbs up to adila..cewahhh..hehe..
lega sgt..then g la cuci instrument..
skali tibe2..baby yg nani conduct pon out without crying..
ok..another terrified thing happen..
but dis tym more worse..
not only 5 min,10 min or setengah jam or 1jam..
the baby really not crying..but she still alive..
her heart was beating but there is no breath from her nose..n not crying at all...
baby seem like gasping for air..
doctor..lari sini sana..
we all yg ade kt situ pon tolong la ape yg patut..
kagum btol tgk doctor paedatric tue..
she was really calm n can give instruction kt kteorg dgn sgt cool kne buat ape..
but at the same tyme..patient yang baru beranaksebelah mypatient's bed tibe2 ade retain placenta..
means..placenta die cannot pull out from womb n need to undergo surgery..
kelam kabut lg nk prepare dis patient msuk OT..
tibe2..mse nk transfer die ke another katil..
dat mama collapse..
cuak..semua cuak..cpt2 angkt mama tue..
we afraid if she had shock..because of bloos loss after delivery..
if very severe mother can.....hmm...
cepat angkt die naek ats katil n put all branula..
n tranfuse normal saline..n measure blood pressure..
n make sure mama always concious..
fuhh..naseb die n cpt2 bwk msuk OT<operation theater>
at the same tyme..back to anothr room yg ade baby td tue..
doctor try intubate her..n bagging wif oxygen..she still xok jgk..
then suddenly doctor find out her baby heart was direct to the right side....
what????dexto cardia???
then they do ultrasound..for a confirmation..seems like it is true
then..tibe2 ade sorg mama admit..
os fully..n she ready to deliver already..
what???sume nurse n doctor sgt busy nie..
n paling menakot kn lagi..mama ni primigravida jgk!!!!
adoii..nk wat cmne nie..i ask myfren to conduct but she said she cant..
then..i decide to conduct it again..
ok..i do another crazy thing again..
takot..tp..klu x spe nk conduct baby nie lahir..
then..i prepare the instrument..
n give the mama instruction what she need to do..
then suddenly 1 doctor come n help me..
hmmm~..lega sgt..
tp..mama nie mcm xpndai je nk teran..n her liquor<air ketumban> color mcm dh ade miconium<stool> stain..
hmm..hope dis baby ok la kt dlm tue..takot jgk la baby dis tyme lemas kt dlam tue..
jerit byk kali kt mama tue suruh teran..
mama ajan mama!!ajan!!..perghh..
jantung baby show sekejap slow sekejap laju..
hmm..takot dh nie..
doctor kt sebelah pon dh cuak gk..she also very new here n also in shockafter see her patient collapse just now after retain placenta..
then..after about almost 1hour..
mama tue dpt gk deliver baby die dgn selamt..
hmm..dis tym..i reallycannot prevent her perinuem to tear..
sory mama..tp xdela besar sgt tear die..
baby pon ok but a bit small la..
at the same tyme..baby yg xnanges2 dr td tu..
doctors dh mcm give up dh..xtaw nk buat ape dh..sume intubation dh bwk kluar dr mulot baby tue..dh mcm nk declare baby to meninggal..
however..1 doctor mcm xpuas ati ag....they do ultrasound again n see baby's heart is still beating..very fast..
then..they trus intubate blik n trus pump her again..
they also pggl juru xray utk buat sudden xray kt baby tue..
i was there..at the same room with the baby n was conducting the delivery for that mother yg dicerita kt ats tue..
xleh n lari kemana dh..terkene skali la xray radiation tue..
perrgghh......daku korban kan diri demi patient..pasrah jelah derrrr..
then..doctor tgk keadaan baby mcm dh improve ckit n rushing to put her in the incubator..
n bring to NICU for further treatment..
fuhhh..penatnye klu ari2 mcm nie..
takot kot....tp inila hidup..
ini la hidup yg aku pilh..<spe suruh!!pdn muke aku!!!>
but...puas hatikn klu kte dpt membantu org..
walaupun xbyk at least..dpt jgk menyumbang pada org laen.
n mungkin ini boleh menjadi bekalan utk akhirat kelak..insyaALLAH..
in future..
adila really wanna be a good doctor..
even..certain thing looks impossible to do..
but at least i shud have a try..dun easily giving up
lebih baek cube..at least ade effort disitu dr xbuat ape..
n will put all my effort to all things that i will do..
ALLAH sentiase ade bersama dengan adila..
insyaALLAH..adila really can do it!!!